Relationship Advice for the Guys: How to Approach a Woman You’re Interested In

By David Wygant

One of the biggest problems for men today is that they suffer from a made-up disease called Approach Anxiety. I keep waiting to see commercials during football games from a major drug manufacturer. It would start like this: a man staring at a woman who is staring at her phone. The man would be thinking about what to say. The woman would still be standing there, checking her Facebook feed or re-reading a text. You can substitute any of the details for this situation because, wherever women go, they’re staring at their phones. It’s their safety blanket, their virtual crutch. It may be annoying, but it still doesn’t give the men a reason not to go and talk them.

Unfortunately, most men will be in this situation and say, “I really wanted to talk to this woman, but she was too busy on her phone.” Women will always have their phone. It’s the way they protect themselves, which means that men have to learn to conquer their Approach Anxiety.

Relationship Advice on Approaching Women from Relationship Expert David Wygant

Related Link: Relationship Advice: When’s the Right Time to Pop the Question (Marriage)?

If you suffer from Approach Anxiety, try this new pill. If you are always trying to think of the right thing to say, then you need to take Approach No More. Now, the side effects may be substantial. You may itch. You may have a chronic stomachache. You may have heart palpitations, but at least you’ll be able to go talk to a woman.

Honestly, I find the whole thing super silly. My relationship advice is to remember that you’re just strangers passing each other during the day. It’s so easy to start a conversation based on whatever is going on in the moment. I call it the power of observation.

Observe what a woman is doing and make a comment on it so you are jumping into her world. For instance, if she’s at Starbucks and ordering a drink you’ve never had, say something like, “I’ve never had that here. Is it good? Is it your favorite?”

Men are always looking for opening lines. Opening lines are the biggest con in the world. Speak, talk, say anything, be human. Talk to a woman like you would talk to a regular person, and stop treating her like she’s ET’s sister. That’s how you approach a woman you’re interested in. Remember that you’re not truly interested in her until you get to know her.

Related Link: Relationship Advice for Guys: Why Is It So Hard to Date? 

So how do you get to know her? You must talk to her. Communicate with her. Speak to her. Talk to her like you would anybody else. In my 20 years of being a relationship expert and helping men and women understand each other, I basically have told men the same thing over and over again: Stop worrying so much about what you say and just say anything. Realize women are more open than you think. They’ll put the phone down if you come and talk to them, if you’re confident about what you say, if you speak to them like you would an old friend. But if you go over there and try to say something clever that’s really not clever, if you say something stupid that you’ve seen on the Internet, or if you’re just shaking in your pants because you’re so afraid to talk to her, she’s going to feel that energy and want to run.

The only way you make a woman interested in you is if you treat her as you treat anybody else, and it’s something that I do all the time. This dating advice works. The problem is that men have been marketed to death and made to believe that they need to do something so spectacular. Try talking to her about what’s going on in the moment and listen to what she has to say. Just treat her like a human being.

David Wygant is an internationally-renowned dating and relationship expert, author of the book Naked, and speaker. Through his boot camps, personal coaching, and his website, his love advice has transformed the relationships and love of hundreds of thousands of people from every corner of the globe. 

For more expert relationship advice from David, click here.

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Dating Advice: Our Cultures Are So Different, Can It Really Work?

Cupid's Pulse Article: Dating Advice: Our Cultures Are So Different, Can It Really Work?

Couple in disagreement. Photo: Innovated Captures / Bigstock.com

By David Wygant

There’s a saying I have in life as a relationship expert. Date someone from common backgrounds. Why? Because you understand one another. When you have a common background, grew up the same way, in similar neighborhoods and schooling, then you’ve got a lot of familiarity between the two of you. Now it doesn’t mean that if you’ve grown up differently it can’t work out at all. What matters most is how you took your childhood experience and manifested it into adulthood. If your concerned about whether or not your differing cultures will cause relationship problems, follow my dating advice as someone who has made it work personally.

Dating advice that will help you date outside your culture successfully.

We live in a multi-cultural world right now. Where people from all over the country are living all over the planet. A person who grew up in New York City might be living in the deep woods in the dark south. A person who lived in LA on the beach might be living in the middle of Manhattan. A guy from India might be living in New York City. A girl who grew up in Bangladesh might be living in the heart of Chicago. The great thing about the United States and the world nowadays is that it’s so multi-cultural. So can it work out if a couple is from different cultures? Can a man from India fall in love with a small-town girl from Sioux City, Iowa after a single date night. The answer is absolutely yes! You see, if they grew up the same way, meaning they grew up with love, similar morals, values, and parents that actually cared about them, then their cultural backgrounds actually make life far more interesting. You see, it’s fascinating dating somebody from another culture, because really it just comes down to communication. And love is not a cultural thing. Love is really about how you relate to things, where your value system is, and how you can teach and show one another the lessons that you both need to go through.

Related Link: Relationship Advice: What To Do When You’re No Longer In Love?

One of the most fascinating experiences I ever had was when I dated a girl from Vietnam. She was fascinating in so many different ways. She grew up in an entirely different time than I did. Her dad actually was an American GI and her mother was a Vietnamese refugee. They met during the war and she was born. She never really got to see her dad because he was moved back to the U.S. and never returned. She ended up moving to the U.S. herself when she was a young adult and going to college. She actually got to meet her dad in the process and got to form the relationship she always wanted. She may have grown up dirt poor, but she grew up with values and a culture that was different than my own. She was appreciative. I on the other hand. grew up in New York, where everything was go, go, go! Despite these differences, our value systems were pretty much the same. Our cultures were very different. but it was a fascinating experience. When it comes down to dating, it’s really about what somebody’s heart says.

Related Link: Relationship Advice: What To Do When You’re No Longer In Love?Dating Advice: Should I Drop All The Other People I’m Interested In?

So ask yourself some serious questions when you think of your significant other. What is their heart about? What does their heart say to you? It’s fascinating that we can date within your culture, but isn’t it more interesting to date outside your culture and learn some new, amazing and beautiful things?

David Wygant is an internationally-renowned dating and relationship expert, author of the book Naked, and speaker. Through his boot camps, personal coaching, and his website, his love advice has transformed the relationships and love of hundreds of thousands of people from every corner of the globe. 

For more expert relationship advice from David, click here.

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Dating Advice: Should I Drop All The Other People I’m Interested In?

Cupid's Pulse Article: Dating Advice: Should I Drop All The Other People I’m Interested In?

Friends partying at a club. Photo: pressmaster / Bigstock.com

By David Wygant

This is always a controversial subject, especially in today’s modern “swipe dating.” 93 percent of the people that go out on a date meet on Bumble, Tinder, Hinge or Match will go home that night and literally get back online to see whether or not there’s somebody else that’s better. Somebody that might be cuter. Somebody that might have a better body. These online dating services are a brilliant marketing ploy to get people to think that there’s a huge paradox of choice. It’s literally like going on Amazon, but instead you get to look at all the men and women out on the market. You see, by getting on all these devices constantly, there’s no reason to ever settle for somebody that’s awesome. So we continually get on this treadmill hoping that there’s something better. I personally have been a victim of this as well. I’ve been single for four years, and even that’s with all my knowledge in the dating field as a relationship expert. I have definitely had my share of going out with somebody and then going home and swiping to see if she is out there. Whatever the version of she or he is, you know that they might be out there, because every day the inventory is changing. Just like your favorite supermarket. Why buy a mushy avocado when you can go buy a brand new one the very next day?

Dating Advice That Will Help You Figure Out If You Should Drop Potential Partners

So how do you know when to stop the treadmill dating? When you find somebody you actually connect with. Somebody that makes it easy to hang out. Somebody that’s authentic and real. Somebody that communicates their needs, wants, and desires and does not play games with you. Somebody that you’re really attracted to, and realize that there’s no perfect person out there, but yet this person is somebody that you’ve never met before. There’s not much to say about this, except grow up. There’s a reason why people are swiping and dating is that they have no idea what they’re doing. People are not giving each other chances anymore to really connect on a deeper level. There are major issues that go on with the swiping and dating, and they contribute to major relationship problems in the future.

Related Link: Relationship Advice Guys Edition: When’s The Right Time To Pop The Question (Marriage)?

You can either get off the treadmill and give somebody amazing a chance for at least a month or two, and if it doesn’t work out, then go back to the hamster wheel of dating. By all means, run back to the roulette wheel and spin and see if you get lucky again; but know that the only way to get to truly know somebody is to actually give them an opportunity to get to know you. Give them a chance, have a mini-relationship. Plus, sincere relationships are far better than minute relationships that last three hours on a first date. Even if you only hang with somebody for 30 days or 60 days, you’re going to learn something amazing about yourself. So my dating advice, I suggest all you swipers, go out there and give somebody a real opportunity. Give them 60 days. See what happens. See if you can form a relationship. Get to know who they are. And make sure to remember that anybody can put on their best game face for 90 minutes on a first date night; but what you truly need is to get to a level of intimacy that you can trust somebody, feel something for them, and have sex that blows you away. If have any questions on this, let me know.

David Wygant is an internationally-renowned dating and relationship expert, author of the book Naked, and speaker. Through his boot camps, personal coaching, and his website, his love advice has transformed the relationships and love of hundreds of thousands of people from every corner of the globe. 

For more expert relationship advice from David, click here.

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Relationship Advice Guys Edition: When’s The Right Time To Pop The Question (Marriage)?

Cupid's Pulse Article: Relationship Advice Guys Edition: When’s The Right Time To Pop The Question (Marriage)?

Carefully considering marriage. Photo: photobac / Bigstock.com

By David Wygant

So you’re under the influence of an amazing woman. You’re thinking about popping the question. All you think about is the future. You think about the love that you’re sharing. You think she’s the one for you. Before you run off to pop that question, it’s time you start smelling the sausages. Yes, sausages. You see, women need to smell the roses, men need to smell the sausages. Let’s bring you back into reality with a real stinky, smelly, greasy, Italian Sausage that you get from the street fair. Before I go on, I need to warn you that I’m about to give you some hard hitting relationship advice. It’s going to hopefully wake you back into reality, and give you an opportunity to make the right decision.

Relationship Advice That Will Help You Figure Out If You’re Ready For Marriage


Marriage is not something you take lightly. It’s not something you rush into, as the great Elvis Presley song Fools Rush In has pointed out. Despite being a relationship expert, in my life I’ve been married a few times. Every single time I got married, I was a fool — like in Elvis’s song — and I always rushed in. I was rushing in based on a story I had. I had to marry her. I wanted to marry her. I’d never been so in love. Yet, I barely knew her… I don’t want you to go through what I went through. Marriage is one of the biggest decisions you could possibly make, because from marriage, comes many different things: a lifetime partner (potentially), with children. And here comes the sausage part of it all — the mother of your children is the woman whose going to take half your money if it doesn’t work out. Oh yeah, I had to throw that last bit in there because that is the truth. Make the wrong decision, and all of the sudden your bank account, and everything you’ve ever worked for in your entire life, will go to somebody else. And if that doesn’t scare you, maybe this will. The woman that you’re so in love with right now, that you think you want to marry, will turn on you most likely. And most likely use your children as a way to manipulate things. Now this may not happen. You may have a future where divorce is amicable. She may not ask for all your money, and she may actually support a great father/daughter, father/son relationship. But I bring these subjects up because when you’re under the influence of a new woman, and your under the influence of thinking you’re going to marry somebody, somebody has to slap you across the virtual face, and wake you up from the fog that you’re in.

Related Link: Relationship Advice: Can You Cheat Jealousy?

So now that I’ve scared you, and have given you some sort of reality check, I want to talk about when you should pop the question. What I’m about to tell you is probably, oh good <?>, it’s an all conventional dating tip. But I think you need to go through eight seasons with this woman. The seasons don’t consist of the NFL, the Baseball or the Basketball season. The seasons consist of two Winters. Two Springs. Two Summers. And two Falls. You need to see this person in everyday situations, over and over, and over again. You see, if you’re in some type of fog from the beginning of the relationship, you’re most likely hanging out with her representative. The well behaved version of herself. You need to see somebody in all situations. How they handle adversity. How they handle conflict. How they handle life stuff that comes up. How they handle work stuff. You need to spend as much time with this person, you’re evaluating them. Talk about how life is going to be when you get married. Talk about the style of parenting you’re looking to do. And yes, you should absolutely discuss parenting style before having kids. Here’s another thing, if you’re going to be with somebody, they need to match your parenting style. If you haven’t thought about parenting styles, then you might just be under the fog of getting married. These are all important things you need to consider when you are thinking of popping the question. There’s no rush.

Related Link: Relationship Advice: True Love or Rebound?

A great relationship builds. You want a best friend. A best friend you can rely on for life. You want somebody who knows you inside and out, so you, not only can feel safe around them, but they can feel safe around you. You need to have an amazing communication relationship between the two of you. These are just some of the things you need to think about before you go nuts, and marry somebody before you’re ready. If you do, your partnership will be plagued with relationship problems. So I repeat, there is no rush! This is the biggest decision of your life! This is the potential mother of your children. This is the woman you’re going to share your bed with. Hopefully for the remainder of your life. So take your time. Get to know her. Make a decision based on not pure emotion, but on pure reality.

David Wygant is an internationally-renowned dating and relationship expert, author of the book Naked, and speaker. Through his boot camps, personal coaching, and his website, his love advice has transformed the relationships and love of hundreds of thousands of people from every corner of the globe. 

For more expert relationship advice from David, click here.

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