Expert Dating Advice: How to Move a Stagnant Relationship to Commitment

On this week’s Single in Stilettos dating advice video, founder and relationship expert Suzanne Oshima talks to relationship author Duana Welch about their best expert dating advice for women for moving a stagnant relationship to commitment. “You don’t get this question a lot from guys because they’re in the pursuer role,” Welch explains. So ladies, listen up!

Relationship Expert Duana Welch Shares Her Tips for Commitment

It’s not as simple as just asking him. It’s tempting to approach him directly with your concern, but Welch encourages you to avoid doing so. “Studies show that guys move you from the possible Mrs. Right category to the Mrs. Right Now category when you do that,” the relationship author warns. “They think you’re low status, that you don’t have any other options.” So how can you move your relationship forward?

Related Link: Expert Dating Advice: Times Women Say ‘Yes’ But Shouldn’t

1. Become slightly less available: This piece of dating advice doesn’t give you an excuse to be mean or ugly to him. Instead, if he calls and you’re in the middle of something, wait a day and then call him back. Be super friendly and warm and simply explain that you were busy. “Let him hear the smile in your voice,” Welch explains. “Men want to make you happy — they feel like crap when they make you unhappy. Pair being slightly less available with being really rewarding to be with when you’re present.”

2. Test commitment with jealousy: “This is really unpopular — boy, have I received some hate mail from men!” Welch shares. But creating jealousy can be a good thing. Among women who create jealous intentionally in a male partner, it’s usually because she didn’t know if he cared or how much he cared. For instance, by accepting a date with someone else, you can easily gauge how it makes a guy feel. “If you do that and he doesn’t care, then he doesn’t care. It’s a really accurate litmus test,” says the relationship author.

Related Link: Dating Advice Video: Dealing With Dating Burnout

3. Avoid ultimatums: Both Oshima and Welch feel strongly that you should never give a man an ultimatum. “It will backfire on you. Even if he goes along with it, he’ll feel like he’s backed into a corner, and he’ll probably rebel later on,” Oshima explains. “It’s always better if he comes to a decision on his own.”

For more dating advice videos and additional information about the Single in Stilettos shows, click here.

For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.

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Expert Dating Advice: The Biggest Dating Pitfalls

On this week’s Single in Stilettos dating advice video, founder and relationship expert Suzanne Oshima talks to relationship author Wendy Newman to discuss the biggest dating pitfalls and offer their best expert dating advice. Newman shares the five dating pitfalls that women often fall into and how to avoid them.

Relationship Author Wendy Newman Shares Expert Dating Advice

1. Feeling obligated to please a man: Women often worry about hurting a man’s feelings or displeasing him, but it’s important to keep your own feelings in mind. For instance, say you meet a man on a blind date, and he lied about his age and appearance. Rather than accepting the lie and sitting through the date, reject him graciously. Explain that he lied and that you won’t be staying. As Oshima explains, “The one thing you can never get back is your time.”

Related Link: Expert Dating Advice: Are You Intimidating Men?

2. Approaching a man with too much information: When dating, it’s tempting to lead with your end game: that you’ll make a wonderful, loving wife someday. But for a man, that’s too much, too soon. To start, he just wants to know whether or not you’ll be a good friend. “Instead, say, ‘This is who I am as an interesting person. Who are you?’” says the relationship author.

3. Dating only one person at a time: By limiting yourself to a pool of one, you’re comparing that relationship to being alone. “And that’s not good. It’ll have us miss important things about them or not ask questions and dig in,” Newman shares. Plus, dating multiple men at once gives you a better understanding of what you want from a relationship.

4. Dealing negatively with compatibility and chemistry: Chemistry is essential to a healthy, happy relationship, but it’s not enough. It’s easy to become distracted by a handsome face or a successful career, but don’t make excuses for him if he’s not the whole package.

Related Link: Dating Advice Video: Don’t Be a Rules Girl!

5. Trying to be someone you’re not: According to Newman, this is the number one mistake. Don’t follow a set of rules or what you think you should do. Instead, figure out what works best for you as you’re building a relationship and stick with it.

For more dating advice videos and additional information about the Single in Stilettos shows, click here.

For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.

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Expert Dating Advice: The 5 Most Terrifying Words to a Man


On this week’s Single in Stilettos dating advice video, founder and relationship expert Suzanne Oshima talks to relationship author Dr. Jed Diamond to discuss the five most terrifying words to a man and offer their best relationship advice. Women are constantly worried about saying that right thing to men, and here, Dr. Diamond teaches you what not to say.

Relationship Author Gives Expert Dating Advice

Related Link: Dating Advice Video: The 5 Stages of Love and Why Many Stop at Stage 3

You’ve probably uttered them before, but you’ll never want to use them again: “Honey, we need to talk.” Oftentimes, women use these words because they want to feel heard and connected. You probably think that those five words will bring you closer together and help resolve any problems you may be facing. However, when a man hears those words, they are like nails on a chalkboard. He immediately feels like he’s going to be reprimanded or criticized and is halfway out the door by the time you finish.

Related Link: Expert Dating Advice: The One Thing Men Want More Than Sex!

So what’s a better way to approach an important conversation with your man? You want to make sure your partner is open to whatever you have to say, but, according to Dr. Diamond’s expert dating advice, you have to remember that men communicate differently than women. As a woman, you’re nurturing and often want to sit down and talk face-to-face. But back in the days of hunters and gatherers, men were used to only one set of eyes of being on them: those of predators. So instead, ask him to take a walk and then start your discussion without using those five terrifying words.

For more dating advice videos and additional information about the Single in Stilettos shows, click here.

For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.

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Dating Advice Video: 5 Ways Women Sabotage Themselves with Men

On this week’s Single in Stilettos dating advice video, founder and relationship expert Suzanne Oshima talks to relationship author Robert Manni to discuss how women sabotage themselves with men and offer their best relationship advice. Here are five ways that women sabotage themselves when looking for love.

Relationship Author Gives Dating Advice


1. You’re not in it to win it: You may say you want to find love, but instead of going out to a new spot where you can actually meet someone, you find yourself in a routine of dinner at home and TV time. “You have to put yourself out there. You have to be willing to fail to be able to succeed,” Manni explains.

Related Link: Dating Advice Video: 4 Ways To Make Your Man Happy!

2. You’re always plugged in: Put your phone down! If you’re walking around New York City with your earbuds in and music blaring, you’re presenting yourself as closed off and unavailable. It’s hard for a guy to ask an open-ended question or chat you up when you’re walled off through technology. Oshima adds, “Those are barriers to meeting someone organically.”

3. You’re not fishing where the fish are: “Go where the guys are!” the relationship author says. You can find guys are at sporting events, at the football field, at a tech store, at a whiskey tasting, or at the gym. Think about your brother and his friends — where do they often go?

4. You’re always with a group of girlfriends: It’s no secret that a pack of women can be overwhelming! Guys are wondering how to handle the group dynamics and just focus on the woman they’re truly interested in. Instead, make it easier for them and single yourself out.

Related Link: Dating Advice: 5 Signs He’s Taking the Relationship Seriously

5. You’re too attached to your list: This is one of the most important ways that women sabotage themselves. “If you stick too closely to your list, you’re going to narrow down your opportunities,” Manni explains. “And the longer you’re single, the longer your list grows.” Make sure your list only includes a few core qualities that are value-oriented and be flexible about your physical type.

A bonus way that women sabotage themselves with men: You throw someone back in the dating pool too quickly. One bad coffee date does not mean the relationship is doomed! “Love grows if you keep an open heart,” the relationship author says. “It can turn into something spectacular if you give love a chance.”

For more dating advice videos and additional information about the Single in Stilettos shows, click here.

For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.

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Dating Advice: Times Women Say ‘Yes,’ But Shouldn’t


On this week’s episode of Single in Stilettos, founder and matchmaker Suzanne Oshima talks to relationship expert Duana Welch to offer their best dating advice on how to stand firm on your beliefs. Find out how you can say no to things you don’t want without losing his affection with the following dating tips!

Dating advice that will save you from making a mistake.


1. Don’t agree to hang out. You need to show a man how you want to be treated by setting standards. Only say yes when he asks you out on a proper date. Reject all requests that are optional or casual hang outs like “Netflix and Chill.” A man that wants you will get the hint and put in the effort for chase. So keep yourself busy until he puts in the work, and only make yourself available for real dates.

Related Link: Dating Advice: What to Do When He Says, ‘I’m Not in Love With You!

2. Say yes to fun. Happy couples have more positive interactions than they do negative. Take time to enjoy your time together or else your relationship is doomed to fail. Also try to avoid gridlock, meaning your problems never get solved. If you only get what you want with a threat, it’s never going to work. You have to care about each other’s happiness.

Related Link: Dating Advice: How to Tell Him You’re Not Ready to Have Sex?

3. Ask if it’s worth it. At some point in the relationship there will be a betrayal. One person will have expectations that aren’t met in a serious manner. If you decide you want to salvage what you have together, you need to ask yourself if it’s worth the effort before saying yes. You may just realize that it’s not and save yourself from wasted time.

For more relationship advice videos and additional information Single in Stilettos show, click here.

For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.

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Dating Advice: How to Tell Him You’re Not Ready to Have Sex?

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On this week’s episode of Single in Stilettos, founder and matchmaker Suzanne Oshima talks to relationship expert Tinzley Bradford to offer their best dating advice on telling a man you’re not ready for sex. Find out how you can tell him without losing his affection with the following dating tips!

Dating advice that will help you say no means no!


1. Tell him. You just need to be honest about how you’re feeling. Whether it’s due to a spiritual reason, or wanting to take things slow, you have to be open about why you don’t want to have sex. If you don’t, the man you’re with may think you’re not attracted to him. So tell him how you feel before a misunderstanding occurs.

Related Link: Dating Advice: 4 Ways To Make Your Man Happy!

2. Be careful. If you go out with him and you know you’re not interested in having sex, you need to prevent yourself from entering awkward situations or temptation. This means you may have to decline invitations to spend the night. There’s no reason to put yourself in an intimate position if you don’t want to go all the way.

Related Link: Dating Advice: Dealing With a Dating Burnout

3. Find out. Aside from being honest with a man, you need to find out his intentions for yourself. Ask him how he feels about you not wanting to have sex. This will help you weed out the men who only see you as a booty call. A man that’s really interested in getting to know you will put in the effort regardless of sex.

For more relationship advice videos and additional information Single in Stilettos show, click here.

For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.

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Dating Advice: 4 Ways To Make Your Man Happy!

On this week’s episode of Single in Stilettos, founder and matchmaker Suzanne Oshima talks to relationship expert Robert Manni to offer their best dating advice on ensuring your man’s happiness. Find out how you can have an amazing relationship with the following dating tips!

Dating advice that will help you keep your man happy.

1. Men are visual! Whether you like it or not, men are highly in tune with their visual and sexual side. For this reason, a man is happy when you keep up your appearance and the sex life is fresh. This shouldn’t be one-sided however, make sure your man shows you the same courtesy. Just keep up the momentum like it’s a new and exciting relationship.

Related Link: Dating Advice: Maximize Your Online Profile to Attract the Right Man

2. Keep it simple. Try to engage your man’s simpler side. You don’t have to cook or dote on him. You just have to spend time with him and partake in his interests from time to time. Whether that’s sitting home and drinking or going to his favorite restaurant. It doesn’t hurt to share your passions, especially when good food is involved. Who doesn’t like to eat?

Related Link: Dating Advice: Dealing With a Dating Burnout

3. Be supportive. A man needs you to be there for him emotionally, physically and even when he’s pursuing a career. Life is stressful enough, so it’s great to have a partner by your side and vice versa. Find out your man’s dreams, learn about him and find a way to get behind that so you can help him achieve these desires. It means a lot to support a man on his journey.

Related Link: Dating Advice: The 5 Stages of Love and Why Many Stop at Stage 3

4. Learn to forgive. Nobody is perfect, so it’s important to give the benefit of the doubt when things go wrong. Just like you, men make mistakes. For this reason you need to know how to forgive. This doesn’t mean you have to excuse something big like infidelity, but men need guidance to be the best version of themselves. He’ll stumble and fall sometimes, but you can pick him up and make things better.

For more relationship advice videos and additional information Single in Stilettos show, click here.

For more videos from CupidsPulse.com, check out our YouTube channel.

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